“So often, when you see someone who’s really good at almost anything, it’s because they actually started out exactly the opposite and then they cared so much about fixing that problem.” — Susan Cain
Susan Cain (@susancain) is the author of the bestsellers Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of IntrovertsandQuiet: The Power of Introverts in A World That Can’t Stop Talking, the latter of which has been translated into more than 40 languages. Quiet is in its seventh year on The New York Times Best Sellers list, and it was named the number one best book of the year by Fast Company magazine, which also named Susan one of its Most Creative People in Business.
She is the Chief Revolutionary of Quiet Revolution, and her writing has appeared in the The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Wall Street Journal, and many other publications. Her record-smashing TED talk has been viewed more than 20 million times and was named by Bill Gates as one of his all-time favorite talks.
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Want to hear more about loving-kindness and mindfulness meditation? Listen to this episode with world-renowned meditation teacher Sharon Salzberg! (Stream below or right-click here to download):
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QUESTION(S) OF THE DAY: What was your favorite quote or lesson from this episode? Please let me know in the comments.
Scroll below for links and show notes…
SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE
- Connect with Susan Cain:
Quiet Revolution | Twitter | Facebook | LinkedIn | Instagram
- Susan Cain’s e-mail newsletter
- Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverts by Susan Cain
- Quiet: The Power of Introverts in A World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain
- The Power of Introverts by Susan Cain, TED 2012
- Macbeth by William Shakespeare
- Childhood Trauma and the Brain, Blue Knot Foundation
- ilili
- Toastmasters
- Public Speaking Center of NY (speakeeezi.com)
- South by Southwest (SXSW)
- My TED Talks
- Microsoft Word
- Scrivener
- The 4-Hour Chef: The Simple Path to Cooking Like a Pro, Learning Anything, and Living the Good Life by Timothy Ferriss
- When Is the Best Time of Day to Write? by Cathy Presland, Author Unlimited
- The Art of Nonfiction: A Guide for Writers and Readers by Ayn Rand
- Draft No. 4: On the Writing Process by John McPhee
- Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott
- The 4-Hour Workweek: Escape 9-5, Live Anywhere, and Join the New Rich by Timothy Ferriss
- Are You Shy, Introverted, Both, or Neither (and Why Does It Matter)? by Susan Cain, Quiet Revolution
- Nobody’s Looking at You: Eileen Fisher and the Art of Understatement by Janet Malcolm, The New Yorker
- Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion by Sam Harris
- The Waking Up App
- Why Loving-Kindness Takes Time by Sharon Salzberg, Mindful
- Love for Imperfect Things: How to Accept Yourself in a World Striving for Perfection by Haemin Sunim and Lisk Feng
- Metta Institute
- Joy on Demand: The Art of Discovering the Happiness Within by Chade-Meng Tan
- Tools of Titans: The Tactics, Routines, and Habits of Billionaires, Icons, and World-Class Performers by Timothy Ferriss
- Getting Started with Mindfulness, Mindful
- Spirit Rock — An Insight Meditation Center
- Why Sad Songs Say So Much by Susan Cain, Quiet Revolution
SHOW NOTES
- What initiated Susan’s lifelong fear of public speaking? [06:51]
- How did the opportunity for Susan to give her now-legendary TED Talk come about, and how was it received at first? [10:12]
- How do introverts handle group dinners? We all have our strategies. [11:23]
- Susan asks if the sixth grade me who shied away from recess to read books about fish could foresee the public life I’d lead. For that matter: what happened to me in sixth grade? [13:54]
- How did Susan begin to overcome her fear of public speaking? [15:38]
- Even seasoned public speaking veterans don’t go into a TED Talk without a kaleidoscope of nervous butterflies fluttering in their stomachs. [18:34]
- If professional speakers have a hard time giving a TED Talk, how did Susan ease her way up to being able to give hers — and now travel the world as a public speaker? [20:21]
- What a lot of great teachers and coaches have in common that gets results. [21:39]
- What pre-game rituals help Susan prepare for speaking engagements these days? [23:55]
- Learning how to speak in public magnifies your ability to do almost everything else — just ask Warren Buffett. [25:49]
- How Toastmasters and a trio of chihuahuas helped me overcome my own reservations about public speaking in preparation for my first presentation at South by Southwest. [26:36]
- How I prepared for my own TED Talk. [29:43]
- Crucial pre-TED help Susan got from Adam Grant — who began as a self-described “terrible public speaker” to become the most popular professor at Wharton. [31:25]
- The importance of rehearsing in front of a live audience before — preferably well before — a big speaking engagement. [33:08]
- How nervous do I get before speaking in public these days? Are my nerves more manageable now compared to when I began? [34:02]
- One extra level of pressure you’ll face if you’re preparing for a TED Talk: don’t go over your allotted time…or else. [37:09]
- As mentioned before, public speaking is a force multiplier for your other skills, and it allows people to see you as an authority. For better or worse, it’s also therapy. [38:29]
- As someone who considers herself a worrier, what hacks does Susan have for relieving the pressure of her worries? [41:22]
- Why did Susan decide to leave her career as a Wall Street lawyer to become a writer? [42:59]
- Necessity isn’t always the mother of invention when it comes to making a living in a creative field. [46:06]
- From start to finish, how long did it take for Susan to write her first book, and why was her editor’s advice to start from scratch after reading her “terrible” first submission such a relief? [48:57]
- Now that she’s got two books under her belt, what does Susan’s writing process look like today? [51:20]
- How does Susan take and organize her notes? [52:13]
- When it comes to using Scrivener over Microsoft Word, Susan would prefer not to. But here’s why I like it and have used it for writing most of my books. [56:03]
- After a year or so of taking notes, the real writing begins. While stopping short of calling this part of the process her happy place, Susan enjoys it on several levels. [57:38]
- As a busy mother, what time of day does Susan tend to write? Without family obligations, when would she prefer to write? [59:03]
- What does Susan’s schedule look like once she sits down to write? Does she take breaks? If so, how often? [1:00:03]
- Writing late at night versus early in the morning, and the things many writers will do to (ourselves included) to put off writing. [1:02:09]
- Books and resources that have had an impact on our writing. [1:04:24]
- Serendipitous meetings that made each of our first books possible. [1:08:38]
- Introversion versus shyness. [1:13:59]
- Books Susan has gifted most. [1:18:16]
- An aside about the first time I met Sam Harris. [1:19:29]
- Susan and I share our experiences with loving-kindness (or metta) meditation and lament its avoidance by many who misunderstand the label. [1:22:10]
- What loving-kindness meditation does for me that mindfulness meditation does not, and something I was doing wrong for years that was eventually corrected. [1:26:00]
- What would Susan’s billboard say? [1:31:04]
- What advice would Susan have for people seeking the ability to deeply connect with others? [1:32:30]
- Susan’s lifelong love of bittersweet and minor key music and a peek into what her next book will be about. [1:33:13]
- Intentions for my next projected book and parting thoughts. [1:35:38]
PEOPLE MENTIONED
- Bill Gates
- Chris Anderson
- Captain America
- The Punisher
- Charles diCagno
- Ken Cain
- Jim Fyfe
- Warren Buffett
- Dale Carnegie
- Hugh Forrest
- Adam Grant
- Mike Tyson
- Dean Martin
- Cus D’Amato
- J.K. Rowling
- Soman Chainani
- Robert Rodriguez
- Ayn Rand
- John McPhee
- Anne Lamott
- Richard Pine
- Leo Tolstoy
- Jillian Manus
- Stephen Hanselman
- Eileen Fisher
- Sam Harris
- Achilles
- Haemin Sunim
- Sharon Salzberg
- Jack Kornfield
- Chade-Meng Tan
- Larry David
- E.M. Forster