My Healing Journey After Childhood Abuse (Includes Extensive Resource List)

You have helped the world with your work. I have benefited so much. This is sad news. But as you have done in the past you help so many.
Mimi

Thank you for being so courageous Tim. I am only now coming to terms with my own personal story of abuse, and I’ve been on the planet for 39 years. You are an inspiration for those who want to heal.

Bravo Tim, Thank you. 2 things I would like to add. I agree the word recovery for me doesn’t work either. I really am not interested in recovering who I was. I have discovered my word that corresponds to my work. I am in revision. I just wanted to add from studying psychology the reason you survived where others might have not is that the positive factors in your life such as your parents. friends, teachers and socio economic status (even if it was middle class) outweighed the negative factors. Give an extra hug to your parents if they added on some good factors!

Thank you Tim so much for telling the world about your trauma. It will help parents to be more vigilant and therefore protects more children from trauma.
It is rarely spoken about that other children/teenagers/young adults can also be the source of trauma for children. The “usual” persona conjured up in abuse prevention material is an adult male. We, as parents, also have the obligation to talk to our own children about the importance to respect physical boundaries no matter the age.
Thank you for your courage in going through such an intense and life changing interview.

Thank you. I’m at a loss for words, but this is the most impactful thing I have ever come across.

Thank you Tim for sharing your story. Trauma is a very common topic which is ignored by society and even people working in the medical or therapeutical field. Speaking out is hard, but important for inducing change – on personal, but also on societal level. Thank you for being that change.

In 2019 i stopped recommending books to people who didn’t ask for it. This is the first time i break this rule because it is too important. For everybody who wants to dig very deep into trauma and dissociation, check out “The Trinity of Trauma. Ignorance, Fragility and Control” by Ellert Nijenhuis. Definitly not an easy read with over 1000 pages spread over two books, the author who works with traumatized and dissociative patients since the 80s connects trauma, dissociation, the body, our consciousness, the brain on a neurological, therapeutical and philosophical level. It is truly mindblowing and changed my perspective on trauma forever. Working with the concepts of this books has had a tremendous positive effect on my patients and Mr. Nijenhuis is a true pioneer of trauma therapy.

Tim, thank you for your incredible courage and compassion. We are all in this together. So much love to you.

Thank you.

Thank you Debbie, thank you Tim for voulnerability and sharing your stories and journeys – this was both depressing, hopeful and powerful – as you say, everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about. May you find peace and may the light only grow in your lives 🙏 love from germany

Thank you

Tim, you are loved and deeply appreciated. Thank you for all I have learned from you, May you enjoy growing happiness and healing.

Dear Tim,

I have been following your work since the 4 hour work week, and have listened to so many of your podcast episodes that in some ways I regard you as a friend already. This episode was brutal, and I almost cried when I heard you describing what happened to you. I’m so sorry. No one should have to go through what happened to you. I have a 2 year old son now and I can’t even begin to imagine what something like that would do to someone.

I’m deeply thankful for your work and the sharing of your journey. There are so many ways in which you have been of great help to me. I can assure that you you helped to improve at least one person’s life with your courage to keep on going. I wish I was half as brave as you.

Love you, man.

Paulo

Thanks for the interview Tim. I want to be better too.

Thank you for sharing this extremely painful and personal experience Tim…you’re a brave man for doing so and you are going to help countless others. May you stay brave and strong on the rest of this journey….Respect young man!!

Brave, brave, brave, brave man!
Thanks for everything you have done in terms of the content you have put forward that has helped me and countless others to become better versions of our selves.
Wishing you pure joy and happiness only.

Thank you very so much for your courage Tim, this will be of enormous use to so many people.

I would add to the list of resources the work of
Richard Miller on Yoga Nidra;

https://www.amazon.co.uk/iRest-Program-Healing-PTSD-Proven-Effective/dp/1626250243

There is some amount of research in veteran’s and others.

I would also add Richard Grannons YouTube channel on CTPSD;

https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCU9xNc-P8GWAdafmAcNVi6g

Also Blindboy Boatmens podcast;

https://play.acast.com/s/blindboy/mymentalhealthphilosophysofar

Both though do love a swear word or three so heads up in advance.

I wish you and anyone else on their journey all the best.

I just want to say thank you!!. Words do not suffice in oder to express what it meant to me to listen to your Story in this week in which I – as a trauma survivor as well – have been retraumatized and just feel I cannot cope anymore. Yesterday I thought that nobody could imagine the intensity of my suffering but listening to your podcast today I realize how wrong I am.
But most important of all I want to tell you that I am so sorry that this happens to you. So sorry! I am looking at my niece who is 4 and cannot believe that someone could do something like this. I deeply deeply feel with you! And thank you again you are helping so many people with being so open about this. This is real strength!
All the best to you!

Tim and Debbie, thank you SO much for sharing. One thing that I wish you would have addressed is contacting law enforcement in order to prevent other sexual assaults by the same perpetrators. I love when victims share their healing journey, but these monsters don’t belong in society where they can hurt others. Have you considered that? Thank you

Abused physically and mentally as a child for many years. From age 4-5 to about 18. From sexual abuse from a father and mental cruelty and physical abuse from a mother. I watched them abuse my brothers, and many times I was taped over the mouth and locked in closets for hours, beaten with the buckle from a belt, wooden spoons and tree branches. I was called stupid and dummy most of the time for my name and made to do the house work, cleaning and laundry for everyone else. I am now 54. I hate laundry, I hate cleaning house, I hate cooking. I dont want to do any of it, not even for me. I want those things a clean house laundry and food, but I sink into deep depression every time I try to do things. Therapy? heh the problem is after failed attempts at any kind of therapy, mostly to inept DR.s (You really do need a very good one that specializes in this) I found I was better off on my own dealing with it my way. This has turned me into a non empathetic person, especially when you cant even trust your own family members, who do you trust…There are many traits I have now that I can definitely link back to the abuse, I specifically did not have children to break the cycle. I recognized in me at a very young age, that I can or could be cruel to children and why? More than likely I was jealous of their innocence, because mine was taken from me. Unfortunately I am a very logical and smart person so therapy was not and is not for me because I can tell you exactly what is wrong with me, how to fix it, but there has to be a seed to actually motivate one to try and over come. This seed I lack and am afraid no one else can plant in me but myself. All I can say and encourage is to continue to fight for the good in yourself, continue to give it a voice and remember to laugh at yourself often. People make mistakes, even offenders, It is not our fault, wrong place wrong family wrong time. Look for the light in everything surrounding you and realize no co dependencies is an answer. Look it in the face for what it is an realize, better me than someone else who would have killed themselves. Thanks to me there are people out there that I was able to rescue and save in one form or another and If I had killed myself or given into the dark side, THOSE people would not be here. God-bless, stay safe and protect yours. Thanks Tim.

One resource I have found to be powerful is Mental and Emotional Release which is a refined version of Tad James’s Timeline Therapy. His son Matt James developed it and wrote this book . It is context free, meaning the therapist does not need to know the story, they are only a guide through the process.
Mental and Emotional Release by Dr. Matt James https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0794W2Z8D/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_dp_x_vSyyFbAAGRZA0 via @amazon

Thank you, Tim and Debbie.

What a brave and beautiful offering to the world to share your stories. I am filled with awe, gratitude, and hope. Healing is possible for us all—thank you for that reminder.

Much love,
Dominique

Thank you for sharing this, Tim. This will be enormously helpful for so many people. Personally, I’ve been helped by the Feldenkrais method and Steve Hoskinson’s Organic Intelligence method. Thanks to them, I’m in a much much better place now. All the best for the future.

Wow – thanks so much to both of you for sharing. What a rollercoaster. I can’t even imagine how difficult it must have been to talk about this & confront this chapter of your past in public. You are doing an incredible selfless service…it will provide help and give strength to so many.

I have been following you, Tim, since over 12 years and to be honest, I always suspected something like that. You are such an over-achiever that I was sure all this energy must have come from somewhere hidden inside. For many years you kept extremely busy to run away from something. That may work for ‘a while’ – but in the long run facing your deepest inner fears and coming to terms with them is the only path to true happiness and recovery. I have also looked the ‘lion in the eye’, not because of an abuse, but I can very much relate.

Thank you for everything you do. I have the utmost respect. I hope to run into you some day.
Warm hugs & love to both of you.
.

Thank you so much for sharing this Tim. I can’t even imagine how tough it is to go through this, but the courage you’re showing by choosing to share this is not only bravery in itself, but inspiring that you chose to put this out there with the possibility of a ripple effect as you mentioned to Debbie about her conversation with you in the earlier podcast. You’re a light in this world Tim. I’m glad that I got to receive this message you shared.

Hi Tim, thanks for doing this podcast. When I heard you say “what are you unwilling to feel?”, I was completely shaken. Thank you for saying “you’re never alone”, and “there’s light”. I’m also on the path to my healing. Thanks very much for telling your truth. You’ve helped me if not millions of people by sharing.

Tim this has taken enormous courage well done. Whilst I have yet to listen to the episode, as someone who works as a mental health practitioner I know how hard this would have been for you. I see first hand the effects of trauma daily and this resource is no doubt needed for many of your listeners.

Looking at your resource list you are certainly sharing some of the best resources available for people not only to survive trauma but to begin to thrive. I would add that Dr Eric Gentry has one of the best courses available online on trauma and it is on udemy. Dr David Burns work is also very interesting from a CBT perspective with his feeling good podcast.

Great work Tim this could save lives. I will be sharing with those who I think will benefit.

Thank you